Thursday, May 21, 2009

IVF #2, take 2

a lot has been going on since my last post.

-i graduated. (pics to be posted if i ever get un-lazy)
-i've been doing things around the house that i have neglected to do for the last 2 yrs while in school.
-i am constantly searching for jobs. turns out, there's not much to choose from right now. just super.
-we started meds for IVF #2 3 days ago as follows:
AM: 20 units micro dose lupron and 225 units gonal-f
PM: 20 units micro dose lupron and 225 units menopur.

they suck. a lot. i have a constant headache, some hot flashes, more rage fits than i remember having last time and of course bloating. it's fine though. i know we are lucky to be able to try this, so i'm not even close to complaining.

my baseline u/s and b/w were monday. i wanted to kick my own ass for even going back to the RE when the u/s lady asked me "so, did we get lucky?!" to which i said "we didn't get anything. if you'll notice, you are doing a CD 2 u/s on me. but hey, it's just a minor detail, right?" i thought about being extra pissed from that point on, but then she quickly corrected herself and asked if we were changing the meds around and reassured me that they often see better results when they put patients with a poor response on the protocol that i am now on. she also said that i have nice antral follicles that are like "ladies in waiting." corny, but it made me smile. my E2 level was 9. i go back tomorrow for my first monitoring appt. hopefully my lazy ovaries are done being stubborn and get their shit together.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

cinco de hi-yooo

or, alternate title: my uterus is a worthless bag of shit.

first, best cinco de mayo ever - i took my last exam of grad school today. while it sucked, a lot, it's over. no more tests, presentations, papers, clinicals (1000 hrs that i worked for FREE). done, done DONE! i am so damn excited that i don't even know what to do w/ myself. i started celebrating by double fisting some delicious beer with my classmates to celebrate and make the horrendous test we just took a distant memory.

now, my uterus is a worthless bag of shit -
i got my period on may 1, exactly 7 damn days late. while i did not believe for a second that i was pg, i was none the less annoyed since i had to get it in order to start the meds for IVF #2. with my uterus and other reproductive parts undying quest to sabotage our IVF, it came at the exact worst time possible. we had to postpone this cycle as well b/c the prospective ER would have been too close to graduation to risk it, and i don't think my mother or husband would allow me to skip graduation;) i really didn't think it was that big of a deal b/c i recalled having this exact conversation with my IVF nurses about what we would do if things fell too close to graduation after our IVF cycle was cancelled. i remember it extremely well, b/c i took notes. that's what i do. i write shit down so there is no question later. i had written down that i could take bcp for 1 week if needed to skip an important date/vacation. 1 m-effing week. one. apparently the IVF nurses had never heard of such a thing. "one week, that's just silly, what do you think one week of bcp will do? no, you can just skip this month and try for next month" this of course led me to have a meltdown and throw a fit like a 5 yr old. b/c, dammit, i wrote down 1 week of bcp and i don't want to wait an entire month. also, i don't "have all the time in the world" as she implied. i only have infertility insurance though my current job. the job that i will hopefully be quitting in a few months after i take boards b/c i need to find a new job as a nurse practitioner. anyway, i lost and we are doing bcp for 2 weeks, then i stop and wait for af and then get the baseline u/s, blood work and start the new medication protocol. argh. extra annoying. also annoying? the IVF nurse tried to make it sound like a super great idea. at least until i told her that this is still basically sitting out an entire cycle and she didn't fool me. i am really having a strong dislike for this RE's office staff. they seem to be chalked full of liars and jerks that give false hope. i miss my old RE. damn insurance.